Fears and Workload

That awkward moment when somebody from my school heard about this blog that wasn’t supposed to be shown to them. This is for the world, for somebody out there who I know is as lost as I am and that we can somehow connect with our emotions and how we feel, this isn’t for someone who thinks that what I write is for psychologically ill persons and that I should be glad because there are kids in Africa who are dying of hunger and stuff (yes, somebody did tell me this and it was the most awkward and horrible moment of my life, so if you have gone through something similar, don’t worry, here I am).
In spite of that, school has been a nightmare. If Freddie Kruger could assault you in your dreams, school could as well, but in your dreams and your daily life. It’s like a never ending spiral of homework, work, pressure, exams, essays, investigations that never touches the bottom. And besides that, I have extra workload with theater, social service and piano classes that are all pulling my strings and squeezing my guts until there is no more energy left.
God, that sounded pretty awful, but in some way it is true, with a little bit of exaggeration. Now I just wish I can be finally in an endless sleep like Juliette with my Romeo by my side, completely ignorant about the weigh of the world on my shoulders.
Worst of all is that I somehow know that Instagram and social networks aren’t doing any good to my life, they are actually damaging it more, but it’s like a drug that you just can’t quit because you are scared that afterwards you’ll be left with nothing. Inside I know that I’ll have much more to give to the world, but fear is holding me back.

Starting a New Me

To all of you unknown people from Africa, America, Tatooine, The Shire, Krypton, Pandora... this is my new blog. And as I said last: it is MINE. I don’t write this to impress anyone, hurt anyone, to show off something to anyone... No. This is the net where I can be myself, this is the place where I can finally take off the mask I’ve worn for such a long time and just be me. So, If you just were wondering why I’m starting to write this, I’m not really sure myself. I don’t even know if I should write it in spanish (my mother tongue) or english, which is the language that everyone understands. But whatever.   Sometimes I’ll write in spanish and sometimes in english. I don’t know, I’ll debate that with my head later. 

So, before I get started with my first writing of the week, or better said, the first writing of my blog, I’ll tell you something about myself, so that you guys see that I’m no different from anybody else. I’m pretty much mortal like you guys, no lucky super-star, no fortunate winner of Slum-dog Millionaire, no wizard student of Hogwarts, no Jedi... Well, everything started with my cries on the night of the 3th of March of 1997 (sorry about the annoying repetition of the preposition “of”). I lived in Panama for 6 happy years, and then we moved to Mexico City because of a  mysterious asteroid coming from Coruscant that hit the whole city’s surface... no, just kidding. I moved because Panalpina offered my father a new charge in Mexico and my father agreed to take it. With no family or any kind of relationship with anyone, I pretty much felt like an Englishman in New York. New school, new challenges, but I’ll come back to all of those details later (I promise :) ). And after eight years of up and downs, I moved to Switzerland last year. Again, a complete new world to me. And imagine me right in the middle of The Difficult Age, with all this hormones going up and down, saying I was an adult, that I could take care of myself, when it came to parties or trips, but on the other hand always wanting a midnight kiss from my mother. I’m talking about the so-called Adolescence. Yeah, we people aren’t very proud of these specific stage of our lives. But whatever. At the end I finally passed school, I could swear to God that this sincerely WAS a miracle delivered gently by the Holy Spirit. Yeah, this year wasn’t the best for me, not only because school, but also because of a lot of other meaningful experiences and happenings. 

And now I’m writing comfortably in my little apartment in Bronx full of garbage and bad smells with Al Pacino right next to me with a gun in my head demanding 5000 box I owe him <= (This part ain’t true AT all).

So I think for now this is it and I hope you liked this text, share this blog if you like it and of course, thumbs-up wouldn’t hurt anyone :)

See you ‘till next time